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The Most Important Question in Relationship Counselling

28/2/2014

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One question can determine whether or not relationship counselling can be successful, and it is a question that can be asked from the outset. I always ask couples who come to see me for relationship counselling this question very early on in the first session, and I will stay with the question until a satisfactory answer is arrived at. If it is possible to do so that is. For without a positive answer to this question by both persons in the relationship, there is no guarantee that any amount of therapy will be able to help.


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The Valley

27/2/2014

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Sitting by the waterfall I take in my incredible surroundings. Dissecting this forested valley is a series of gushing waterfalls that teem down the mountain into the stillness of the lakes below. Lakes that are encircled by the majestic tree lined mountains, their colours vast and varied. Silent sentries protecting the peace of the valley.

My mind wanders back in time to the creation of this breathtaking valley. This oasis of perfect creation, where stillness and peace are as natural as the trees and the birdsong. I imagine how this valley was formed. A monumental glacier cutting its path effortless through this mountain terrain.


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Mindful Walking

27/2/2014

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Mindfulness is the deliberate and focused attention on the present moment, without judgement or attachment. The most common way to practise mindfulness is by focusing our attention on the breath as a means to attend to the present moment and our experience of it. But there are others.

Mindful walking is one other way to practise mindfulness. Simply, instead of focusing on the breath as a means to keep our attention on the present moment, we instead focus our attention on the act of walking. We walk, and as we do we pay deliberate and focused attention to our walking and our sensory experiences in the present moment, without judgement or attachment. Just as with mindfulness of the breath, mindful walking is a practise, and as we practice it we will find our minds drawn to thoughts or other things. Our practice then is to notice what has happened, and then to kindly and gently return our attention to the present moment. In this case our walking.


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    Author

    I am a psychotherapist, trainer, coach and meditation teacher, working with people face to face in Dublin, Ireland, and worldwide via Skype. I blog about mental health, happiness, personal growth & development, spirituality, and other things that interest me.

    Disclaimer

    The author(s) of this blog express thoughts and opinions based on personal and professional experience. Please note that as there is no established professional relationship between author and reader, that this blog does not constitute therapy or professional advise and should not be taken as such.

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